


Choices and Confessions

by catstiel-and-deano (Letmefall)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Castiel in the Bunker, Fluff, Love Confessions, M/M, Marriage Proposal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-30
Updated: 2016-01-30
Packaged: 2018-05-17 06:29:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5857702
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Letmefall/pseuds/catstiel-and-deano
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cas has enough of Dean's stubborn behavior. Damn, he had proposed to him - actually proposed - whilst being smitten by a demon. But then, Dean surprises him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Choices

“I asked you something, Dean. What about an adequate answer besides the noises you make?”

But Dean just kept on coughing and nearly choked on the sip of water he swallowed a few moments ago.

“I understand that you may be irritated by my blunt behavior. But, Dean, someone has to address the -”

“You mean the big pink elephant in the room?” Dean interrupted as he finally managed to get himself back together and set the burger he wanted to eat so bad and the glass of water back on the table.

“I fail to see any animal in this room.” Cas said matter-of-factly and furrowed his brows (which was in no way adorable). He was trying to look angrily at Dean because once again he was more interested in his self-cooked mead. And it was infuriating.

Cas sighed. He was so tired of always being the one who had to force Dean to talk to him about their… well their _situation_. And it wasn’t just that Cas was getting tired, he was becoming sad since Dean didn’t seem to care about their friendship _slash_ relationship _slash_ love affair _slash_ whatever-makes-Dean-happy-ship.

“I was _dying_ , Cas!” Dean defended himself, still not able to look at the angel that now considered standing up and just leave Dean be, letting him the freedom to make a choice whether to follow Cas in order to talk like an adult would do or to remain in his lucky pool of ignorance. Like he has done for years.

Back then, when the tale of a fallen angel was nothing more than that - a fairy tale - to keep stumbling angels like Cas who never followed blindly and always dreamt too much (stumbling and doubting and falling so damn hard) supervised, Cas would have had the patience to grant the green-eyed hunter a few more days, maybe even years, to come to terms with himself.

But _this_ Cas - who sat in front of Dean, who fell not just from grace, from heaven but _in_ something that was so much bigger and greater than he always dared to believe and who has been given the chance to experience human emotions and wanted to experience so much more even though he was now _mojoed-up_ again (like Dean used to call it) - didn’t want to wait any longer as he has already waited for more than six years.

Therefore, Cas didn’t run away but stayed like he always did.

“You weren’t _dying_. You nearly died when you made that deal with Death six months ago to get rid of the Mark. You somehow died when Metatron stabbed you. And you died when you sold your soul and went to hell to save your brother. You weren’t dying a few seconds ago. You were just shoveling too much food into your mouth.” Cas told Dean, gazing at him intensely.

And for a while Dean couldn’t do more than to blink. Not thinking of anything to say to flee this conversation that could change Dean’s whole life.

“Hate to break the news to you but a man can actually die from choking on a piece of burger.” Dean meant after a while and gathered an annoyed look from Cas.

“Do you really think I would let you die from dyspnea after I saved your ass a couple of times?” 

Again, Dean was speechless. It seemed like his angel was kinda pissed and Dean couldn’t really blame the guy for that. Yeah, he wasn’t exactly acting like a grown-up man recently but it wasn’t like Dean hadn’t told his friend that he wasn’t a role-model, right? He had warned Cas. So it was Cas’ own fault when he did expect more from Dean than he was ready to give, right? _Right_? Yeah, Dean, blame the angel.

“I don’t know what you think, Cas.” The hunter heard himself say mechanically and froze as the words had left his lips knowing that this would be the start of the kind of conversation Dean has successfully avoided for six months.

“I think” Cas began while watching Dean with nothing more than concern and trust like he always did. “I _think_ you proposed to me in the heat of the moment when you were smitten by that demon. Hence, I won’t take it seriously. But the impulse for that question was - and I’m sure of it - because you feel something for me and I dare to say that this feeling is labeled as _love. Romantic_ love… _Buddies_ don’t marry one another, Dean.

I _think_ that you are avoiding me by running off on hunts, choking on your food or pretending to sleep - sometimes pretending to even sleep _with_ someone - because you are scared of finally being happy. Of finally experiencing things and feelings in another way you did before. And I think you hope that your cool behavior towards me will either push me away or make me hate you.

I’m not as dumb as you think I am. I learnt a lot. I felt and I am still _feeling_ a lot. And I am here for you - no matter what choice you’re going to make. But I have waited such a long time for you to come out… I can’t bear to see you crawling back and wait another moment.

So here I am and I’m asking you to make a decision whether you want to be romantically involved with me or not.”

As Cas closed, he met Dean’s gaze and for the first time Cas couldn’t decide if there was horror or realization in Dean’s eyes.


	2. and Confessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy End ahead :-) Enjoy!

“I meant it.” Dean said and Cas’ heart skipped a beat.

He stared at Dean, waiting for Dean to laugh his words off and disguising them in the costume of a cruel joke.

Like he always did. Like he was used to do.

But Dean didn’t say another word. There was no laugh, no. Not even glitter to decorate his confession which stood naked and exposed between the two of them.

“Pardon?” Cas asked, not able to bring himself to believe Dean’s words.

Maybe this wasn’t real. Maybe he had fallen asleep in the middle of one of those crappy TV shows. Maybe he was hugging that big green pillow again, imagining it would be his hunter instead of just the ugly pillow Sam bought him as he could no longer listen to Cas complaining about the uncomfortable couch the last Man of Letters had bought.

“Don’t do that, Cas. Please.”

Cas frowned and tilted his head to one side. Like every other time this movement didn’t fail to bring a smile to Dean’s lips.

“Don’t make me repeat it. _Any_ of it. I didn’t even believe I would have the nerve to talk about... about _us_ , you know.”

Dean let out a breath he didn’t know he was holding and exhaled deeply as he watched understanding crossing the angel’s features.

“You don’t have to, Dean.” Cas said and Dean could hug the fuck out of the black-haired-man but he didn’t want to cross any boundary he himself had so carefully set up in order to protect himself from losing another person who meant the world to him.

“But Dean… maybe - and if this bothers you, you don’t have to do it - maybe you could nod or shake your head… because I have to _know_ , Dean.“

The eldest Winchester looked at Cas who begged for nothing more than Dean to move his head. He simply wanted him to nod or to shake his head and suddenly he hated himself for being so damn afraid when it came to feelings, when it came to a special blue-eyed man.

So he brought himself to nod for the first time and almost regretting it as he thought of the possible occurring life changing consequences his actions could bring.

What if Dean accidently admitted his feelings?

What if Dean accidently hurt Cas?

But… wasn’t that already happening? With Dean not talking to Cas? With Dean proposing to Cas? With Dean trembling over words and not able to repeat them? Cas must think he’s crazy.

But wasn’t Cas already crazy for sticking around with him? During the apocalypse, through purgatory, with the Mark and in every other universe they’ve been sent to?

Cas has always been there and Dean has always been there. To protect each other. To fight for each other. To _care_ for each other.

And it hit Dean like a ton of dead vampire bodies.

Perhaps he wouldn’t have to lose Cas. Perhaps the universe was telling him that they were meant to be. In any constellation. In any life. In any aftermath.

But before Dean could say something, Cas had already taken a step towards Dean who was now craving Cas’ closeness to comfort him, to tell him that he finally understood, that he was a dumb idjit like Bobby would name him.

“There are just three questions I would like to ask you.” Cas begun and Dean nodded like he promised to do.

“First, do you have plans for the night?”

Dean shook his head, assuming that Cas probably would take him to a fancy restaurant like he learnt from Sam’s fluffy-duffy-love-movies and it made him smile. _Cas_ made him smile.

Dean was never one for romance, but with Cas he would try. Hell, he didn’t even hate the thought of doing typical couple-things with the angel.

“Very good.” Cas smiled mischievously and for a short moment Dean wondered if he was right. Maybe Cas wasn’t speaking of a date but of something else?

“Secondly.” Cas said and was taking another step towards the hunter so that he was now standing so close in front of Dean that the Winchester was able to feel Cas’ breath on his lips and it drove him crazy.

Dean nodded even though Cas hadn’t explained further. But Dean simply needed to occupy his brain with other thoughts than kissing his angel.

“Secondly,” Cas repeated and a grin was forming on the hunter’s lips as he noticed that the angel got distracted too. “Secondly, I would like to ask you out on a date with me. Tonight.”

Confused, Dean nodded again. The hunter almost asked what his first question was about when question number two could easily replace the first one but he couldn’t bring himself to do it and suddenly his lips were closed by Castiel’s and he responded eagerly.

“That would have been my third question. I’m sorry, Dean but you’re too tempting.” Cas huffed with a weak smile on his lips as he gently pushed Dean away, his eyes never leaving their green matches.

“It’s more than okay.” Dean whispered as he closed the annoying distance between him and his angel once more, holding him as close as possible, wondering how he could have ever survived without Cas pressed flat against his body.

He felt Cas smile against his lips and heard him letting out a quiet sigh as they had to end the kiss in need of some air.

Dean caressed Cas’ cheek affectionately as his earlier question popped up in his head. “Cas, why were you asking me if I have plans for the night when you’re asking me out on a date one moment later?”

“Oh…” Cas blushed and a chuckle escaped Dean’s mouth which was replaced by a stunned expression after Castiel’s next sentence.

“The first question was about your availability for sexual intercourse that night after our date.“

Cas smirked as he caught Dean off guard and gave him a short peck on the lips before turning around, leaving Dean simply be.

“Cas!” Dean shouted as he watched his angel leaving the kitchen. “Stop!”

Cas did like he was told and waited for Dean to close the gap between their bodies once more. And Dean did not disappoint him as the hunter stopped mere inches in front of him, trying to form a complete sentence without getting too lost in his desire to kiss Cas’ pink lips.

“You can’t just ask somebody to fuck them before even asking them out.” Dean explained but Cas didn’t bother to seem sorry but rather looking amused.

“The order of my questions may have been wrong but so was yours. You can’t just ask someone to marry them without taking them out before that. Moreover, I did not ask to fuck you, but to participate in _sexual intercourse_ with me which sounds less rude than your choice of words. Now I apologize, but I have to make myself presentable for my date tonight as he has that fondness for black suits and beige trench coats.“

With that Cas made his way down the hallway to his room. He chuckled as he heard Dean laughing and confessing everything Cas ever wanted to hear (okay almost everything).

“You got the worst pillow talk ever, Cas! But I’m still gonna marry you one day!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you had as much fun reading like I had writing :-) You can let me know by leaving comments or kudos! Thank you!
> 
> You are also free two visit me on tumblr (I'm not biting!):
> 
> http://catstiel-and-deano.tumblr.com/


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